THROW AWAY FLOW

Twelfth night is meant to be the time for clearing away greetings cards and festive decorations. In my book, some superstitions are best ignored.  As I don’t receive some mail till early January, mostly from abroad, my cards stay up longer and the last to arrive are the last to disappear.  Thus, I span the Western and the Eastern festive dates.

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My decorations are the cards people send me.  Switch on candle glow (LED’s) provide an atmospheric friendly warmth.  The little candles (tea lights) have been  tucked away.  A couple of stocky gold coloured ones have not.  They glitter and look quite pretty when daylight turns into twilight, even if they are not lit.

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Tomorrow we have a recycling collection. The bulk of the cards – not the late arrivals – have been sorted between those that will be a keepsake, (just a few) or those needing  some attention. The others, will provide material for recycling.  Our collectors do not want anything with metallic finishes, which includes glitter. Lots of cards have those pretty finishes. The best I can do is to separate re-usable bits of a card from those bits that are not. That was late morning……..

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….Even later morning, I seem to have spent hours sorting out a small area of desk. The quarter truth is, some of the space on the desk has been created by shoving some stuff to the right of it, (probably, should be ‘right off it’). I am trying to be tough on myself…about bits of paper (cringe).  I know it will be worse before it gets better.

Early afternoon……hubs interrupts my bits of paper throw away flow.  “Are you having any lunch?”

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COMPLIMENTS

Those expansive statements like, ‘We’re all creative’ which often come out as throw away lines, in my view, need some explanation. Because it is a positive statement this type of comment is often accepted without question. Who wouldn’t take a compliment, enjoy feeling good. I would and you would, I am sure.

What would happen if we were told ‘we’re all bad’? Apart from a sense of affront, It is likely demands would be made for an explanation; why? Because it is a negative statement which none of us would like levelled at us. In fact it is a contentious accusation for which we are entitled to an explanation in order to defend ourselves.

So, we just accept without question anything with a positive connotation. It gives us a warm glow. I agree, we deserve some of those nice feelings too. Yet, specific complimentary comments should, I believe, be expanded upon in the same way as negative ones need to be. In general they are not casual throw away lines they are statements containing carefully crafted expectations. We are unwittingly drawn into a collusion, an acceptance we have ‘X,Y, or Z’, the consequence being, that we feel obliged to produce the goods that go with the ‘X,Y & Z’ that we are told we all have. On the one hand it can be a true motivator, on the other, it can place unreal expectations upon us that set us up to fail. A conundrum indeed.